Professor Haggard had a most unusual collection
of rare and ancient artifacts from all around the world
He kept them in his attic and he kept them in his basement
for everything he had he had a suitable replacement
He had two suits of armor
and two two stuffed bats
two shrunken heads and two shrunken hats
two long spears with poison tips
two big cases of wax lips
Professor Haggard had a most unusual beard
a ratty mat of ragged hair that nearly reached the floor
it wasn't growing from his chin, it grew out of his ears
he liked the way it made him look but hearing was a chore
He had two gold records and two gold teeth
two jars of ancient chipped beef
two clown shoes, size 32
two big mummies with the curse removed
two red turbans, two magic lamps
two Les Pauls and two blown amps
two lost works of Dr. Seuss
two bronze statues of Bullwinkle Moose
Professor Haggard had a most unusual mansion
The roof was made of rubber and the floors were made of fur
His wife was very patient with his plentiful collection
At his wife's insistance there was only one of her
He had two french horns, two beds of nails
two long brontosaurus tails
two stone clubs that cavemen used
two timebombs, both defused
two small bags of magic beans
two half-finished time machines
two big frogs, never been kissed
too many things to possibly list
Professor Haggard had a most unusual collection
